


Five times Zach pretends to be Alex's boyfriend and one time he didn't have to

by TheAverageOne11



Series: Zalex Week 2k20 [6]
Category: 13 Reasons Why (TV)
Genre: 5 Things, 5 Times, 5+1 Things, Awkward Boners, Camping, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Hugs, Kissing, M/M, Party Games, Sharing Clothes, Truth or Dare, zalexweek2k20
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-12
Updated: 2020-07-12
Packaged: 2021-03-05 02:21:53
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,445
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25226743
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheAverageOne11/pseuds/TheAverageOne11
Summary: Alex is heartbroken to learn that Winston was actually Monty's boyfriend and was probably just using him to find out what happened.But he can't seem to shake Winston off without revealing that he's actually responsible for Bryce's death. Luckily, Zach has the perfect plan.AKA Five times Zach pretends to be Alex's boyfriend and one time he didn't have toAKA The complete revamp of Episode 4 (The Zalex parts anyway)
Relationships: Zach Dempsey & Alex Standall, Zach Dempsey/Alex Standall
Series: Zalex Week 2k20 [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1816006
Comments: 18
Kudos: 133
Collections: Zalex Week 2k20





	Five times Zach pretends to be Alex's boyfriend and one time he didn't have to

**Author's Note:**

> For Zalex Week Day 4 - Fake/Secret Relationship,  
> Day 5 - Clothes Sharing  
> Day 6 - Games.

**The first time** , Zach had just finished setting up him and Charlie's tent and went to take a stroll around the area they'd chosen as their campsite. By the time he came back, he found Alex sitting curled up in his tent.

"Alex?" Zach called out. When the other boy looked up at him, Zach's heart dropped as he saw a soft redness around the brunet's eyes, showing that he'd been crying. "Hey, what's wrong? What happened?" asked Zach, immediately sitting down next to the boy.

"Can I stay with you tonight?" Alex said suddenly, his gaze fixated on the ground beneath him.

"I thought you were gonna share a tent with that Winston guy." Alex winced as soon as he mentioned Winston.

Zach had asked Alex to share a tent together, but apparently he had already made an arrangement. Zach felt a little angry then, not at Alex, but at Winston, and he couldn't explain why. He didn't even know the guy yet Alex would rather spend the camping trip with him than with Zach. It wasn't just that one time either; whenever he would see Winston and Alex talk to each other in the school halls he found himself wanting to interrupt. It was strange, but Zach didn't think too much on it because it wasn't the first time he'd felt that way with Alex. He recalls being upset whenever Alex mentioned anyone else helping him with his P.T.. Then again, Zach didn't think much on anything as he was drunk most of the time.

"Not anymore." Alex said after awhile, visibly upset but seemingly holding it in. Zach could tell something was wrong, something Alex was hesitant to tell him and he hated that.

"Alex, talk to me man. We promised we'd be the type of friends who can tell each other anything, remember?" Zach said with a smile, giving Alex a friendly nudge with his elbow. Alex finally met his eyes, a single tear rolling down his eye.

"Winston and I... we - we had a thing." Alex confessed. Zach felt a sudden tight feeling in his chest that he couldn't really describe. He ignored it and kept looking at Alex expectantly. So Alex is into guys. He thought so ever since their kiss, but he never really breached the topic with Alex, because as much as he hated to admit it, the topic made him strangely uncomfortable.

"I thought - I really started to like him, you know? And I thought he did too..." Alex continued, his voice slow and heavy. Zach found himself feeling angry at Winston again, even though he hadn't done anything yet. Why has he feeling like this? "But... It turns out he's just been using me this whole time, just like everyone _fucking_ else I know." Alex spat, a sob escaping him. Zach clenched his fists, his anger at Winston reaching a boiling point now that it's finally justified.

"That fucking asshole!" Zach jumped up then, already scanning the surroundings to find Winston. He didn't even know what he'd to - or say to him, just that he needed to find him. But Alex jumped up as soon as he did, stepping in front of him with a rush.

"No! He knows!" Alex said in a hurry, pressing both of his hands onto Zach's chest as to push him back.

"What?" Zach asked, his face scrunched up in confusion.

"Well, he doesn't know - at least we think he doesn't but he has a hunch and I-"

"Woah, slow down, Alex. What's going on?" Zach asked in confusion, starting to feel a little left out as he stopped Alex's nervous babbling. Alex looked at him, realization dawning on him as he took a deep breath before continuing.

"Ani caught me and Winston making out on Valentines Day." Zach inhaled deeply, feeling the same tight feeling in his chest, not bearing the image of WInston and Alex making out. "She told Clay and he told me that Winston was Monty's boyfriend and that he was trying to get justice for Monty because he got killed in jail." Zach's jaw dropped as the other boy explained.

"Monty?! What the fuck? There's no way." Zach said in disbelief, having to spend the entirety of last year teaching Charlie not to call people 'fags' like Monty was teaching him to.

"That's what I thought too, but it makes sense. He kept asking me about Clay, Tyler, Ani... You. I should have realized it was suspicious of him to even know you guys this well already, much less ask about you. God I was so stupid!" Alex said, hitting himself in the forehead. Zach had a mini heart attack at that, remembering how Alex's parents told him that all it took was one bad hit to the head and Alex could...die.

Zach shook his head, brushing off those gut-wrenching thoughts and gave Alex a hug. Alex seemed surprised by the sudden warm embrace, but quickly wrapped his arms around his body. He felt the other boy squeezing harder and harder until he heard another sob escape Alex. He started massaging circles into Alex's back, trying to comfort the brunet.

"I tried to break it off with him, but he won't leave me alone. God, what if he already knows I killed Bryce? I don't know what to do, I-I can't be too suspicious." Alex said nervously to Zach's chest. Zach put his hand gently on the back of Alex's head and raised his head from it's resting place on Alex's shoulder, trying to think of something that would help him.

That's when he saw him. In the distance, about 20 meters away from them, was Winston, wearing his usual coat and scarf and staring right at Zach. Zach felt his rage building again, but calmed himself down and looked away from WInston almost as soon as he saw him, not to arouse suspicion. He gripped Alex righter, to prevent any sharper movements from the other boy.

"Act normal and don't move. Winston's staring at us from behind you." Zach said. Alex gasped and predictably moved to turn around, but Zach's hand on the back of his head prevented him. "What did I just say? This is good, maybe he'll get the wrong idea and leave you alone." Zach explained still holding onto the other boy and resting his chin on his shoulder once again. Half a minute passed and Winston still hadn't moved. Their hug clearly wasn't doing the trick.

"He's not moving is he? God, what do we do?" Alex asked anxiously. Zach sighed, a thousand thoughts going through his head, but one single thought persisting. They could just separate, but Winston would just bother Alex again. The longer they waited, the more suspicious the would be. Zach had no choice, at least, that's what he told himself.

"Whatever you do, don't freak out." Zach warned, before leaning back slightly to look at the other boy's face. As a few inches of distance opened up between them, Alex looked up at him in confusion. That was the last thing Zach saw before he leaned in and connected their lips. He felt a muffled gasp come from Alex, but he didn't react in any other way. It felt just like that night on the rooftop, but closer, even more intimate in a way. In just a couple of moments he felt Alex's lips dance against his own, finally returning the kiss. It was a good kiss, Zach realized, though the feeling of their lips together that night on the rooftop have invaded his thoughts a lot more than he'd like to admit, so he already knew Alex was a good kisser. It was when Zach unconsciously let his tongue poke out and try to deepen the kiss however, when he decided to pull back. _What was he doing?_ Alex must have felt it too, because he looked at him with utter confusion, that could just be because Zach kissed him seemingly out of nowhere.

Zach took a quick glance forward, where Winston had been standing prior to the kiss and saw no one. _Thank god._ It seems that the kiss was finally enough to get Winston to leave Alex alone. But Alex was still looking at him, his gaze eerily similar to the way he looked at him on the rooftop before he kissed him. Zach gulped, pulling his thoughts together.

"S-Sorry. I-I just wanted to - If he thinks we're dating he'll leave you alone. Look, he's gone." He explained, pointing with his head towards the distance where Winston had been. He saw Alex's face drop for a moment, finally snapping back to reality before turning around to check,

"Oh...right - good. T-Thanks...I guess?" Alex mumbled, finally moving out of the taller boy's personal space. Zach frowned, the last thing he wanted was to lead Alex on. Maybe he shouldn't have done that, maybe it wasn't thoughtful, but at least, Winston would be out of his hair.

"You, uh, you still wanna camp with me? I will ask Charlie to go to his friend's tent." Zach said, forcing a smile as he pointing to the tent behind him with his thumb. Alex nodded hesitantly. Zach just nodded back happily, clapping his hands together before leaving to find Charlie. Great, of course he managed to ruin the one good thing about his life right now and make it awkward between them. Zach could only hope it worked and Winston would go away, because that was so insensitive to Alex. What was he thinking? And why did it feel just as good as kissing a girl?

Zach sighed, realizing that he needed to get very drunk if he had any hope of getting through the day. He took out his flask and took a sip, already relishing in the feeling of alcohol flooding his system.

 **The second time** , a bunch of them had gathered around the campfire late into the night. Luke Holliday was already so drunk that Zach and Alex could practically smell the vodka from across the campfire. Diego, who shared a tent with him, wasn't so happy about it.

"There is no way I am sleeping with this mess. Anybody care to switch? I will pay up. I have money, weed, snacks, alcohol, my dick... Whatever you prefer." Diego said. Everyone laughed at the last offer. "Hey, I'm serious. I'm desperate here." But there no volunteers. Besides Zach and Alex, there were just primarily jocks and cheerleaders, with a few groups of friends gravitating around them, but not really interacting with them. Alex didn't even want to come, but Zach drunkenly said that it would be fun and that was apparently all that Alex needed to follow him blindly wherever he went.

"Okay, how about this. Let's play truth or dare-" Everyone groaned as Diego mentioned the game, some even starting to get up to leave. "Hear me out! You have to perform every dare and tell every truth, if you don't, you drop out. First person to drop out gets to share the tent with Luke tonight, Last person standing gets whatever prize they want from the aforementioned prizes." Diego explained, looking at everyone expectantly. Zach just scoffed, but stayed put, too drunk to care. Alex however, didn't seem to eager to stay.

"Zach... you can't be serious..." Alex complained, looking at Zach like he was an idiot. He probably was.

"Come on Alex... If you really don't wanna play you can go back to the tent and get some sleep. I will catch up." Zach said drunkenly, taking another sip from his flask.

"Um, no. If you lose, it affects me too. We're in the same tent, remember?" Alex said, but Zach just shrugged. Alex groaned, but ultimately stayed put. Everyone around the campfire was complaining about how unfair it was and was an obvious trap, but they stayed anyway.

"Okay then, we have quite the crowd, let's get-"

"Mind if I join?" Another voice added, sitting opposite of Zach and Alex. They looked up to find Winston, sitting down a knowing smirk.

"Winston my dude, the more the merrier! It's perfect, I think you'll really like one of the prizes on the list." Diego said with a wink. A laugh erupted around the campfire, but Winston just snorted.

"Eh, I don't know. I don't think it will...live up." Winston commented, staring at Diego's crotch. Diego widened his eyes, almost offended as a string of 'dayuums' and 'Ooooh!'s spread along the campfire. But Alex was concerned. Winston knew what Diego's 'prizes' were which meant he was listening in. If he's joining in, he must be plotting something.

"Zach, we should really go." Alex said as Winston's eyes landed on the two of them, still smirking confidently.

"Oh come on Alex, lighten up and have some fun. He can't do anything. Relax." Zach said drunkenly as he took another sip of his flask. Alex really wished he could take that damn thing, but Zach was stronger so it would take a lot of time and it would make too much of a scene in front of everyone, especially Winston. Alex gulped, deciding to stay put. He had a really bad feeling about this.

"Well, There's a campfire in the middle so we can't have a bottle..." Diego said, looking at everyone. "We'll just ask people at random. I still start - Winston." Diego said, with a proud smirk on his face. Winston just smiled at him playfully, amused. "Truth or dare?"

"Truth." Winston replied quickly. A couple of people boo'd, but Diego's smirk only grew .

"Would you ever have sex with me?" Diego asked confidently.

"Yeah, I would." Winston replied with a grin, sneaking a glance in Alex's direction, as if he was expecting some sort of reaction. Some of the team cheered Winston and the cheerleaders just gave an applause. Diego just gave a victorious grin.

"Zach. Truth or dare?" Winston asked, suddenly looking at Zach. The circle around the campfire went quiet as they awaited Zach's answer. Zach suddenly turned pale. He hadn't expected Winston to actually be bitter about anything, but then again he hadn't really been thinking at all. Alex sighed beside him, shaking his head.

"Dare." Zach replied, trying to look as confident as possible. Alex facepalmed beside him. He knew Winston was out to get him and yet he took the riskier option anyway.

"Excellent. I dare you to... make out with Alex." Winston said with an amused expression on his face. Everyone around the campfire seemed very interested now, one of the cheerleaders even saying 'okay, this is gonna be hot'. But Zach was incredibly anxious if his shaking leg was anything to go by.

Zach looked at Alex, silently asking for permission. He was surprised to find Alex wasn't angry at him, but rather, he seemed to feel sorry for him. Alex gave a gentle nod before leaning it. Zach met him halfway, his heart pumping faster and faster the closer they were. When their lips met, he felt Alex's tongue push through his lips. Zach barely held back a moan, which would have been very embarrassing and put his hand gently on Alex's back. He heard a 'Yeah!! Get it Dempsey!' from Diego and a few gasps from everyone around them, but besides that, it was total silence. Zach tried to focus on the noise, so he doesn't lose himself in the feeling. Because it's a damn good feeling, kissing Alex, their tongues dancing with each other for the first time. Alex pulled away first, looking captivated for a moment, but his face turning neutral almost immediately. He had the cutest shade of pink on his cheeks as well. Zach licked his lips before whatever little drunken self-control he had left returned, and sat up straight again, returning his attention to the game.

A few more rounds passed before a girl named Maddie dared Winston to prank call Mrs. Jensen, something Alex and Zach were especially angered about but ultimately kept their mouths shut as Mrs. Jensen didn't answer anyway. Alex and Zach shared a look then, already knowing that Winston was going to ask them next. Alex whispered to Zach to pick truth this time, and Zach nodded, though a guilty party of him wanted to take dare just to have a chance of kissing Alex again. Huh, how drunk was he?

"Zach. Truth or Dare?" Winston asked, looking at them. One of the jocks said 'Damn, you really have it out for Dempsey tonight' and they had no idea how right they were.

"Truth." Zach replied quickly, glancing at Alex, who had an approving smile on his face. But when Winston's lips widened into a cocky grin, they realized they made a mistake.

"Are you into guys, Zach?" Winston asked, still smiling. Zach's face dropped. Apparently he wasn't drunk enough because he immediately realized what Winston was doing. If he said no, Winston would say he found them kissing, which a few other people must have seen as well as they were at the campsite, and based on the rules of the game, Zach would drop out. Seeing as no one else dropped out yet, he would have to have Holliday sleep in his tent, which would leave Alex with...Winston. A wave of anger overtook Zach as the image of Winston and Alex sleeping together. He couldn't do that...

"Say no." Alex whispered to him, a sympathetic look on his face. Alex knew what Winston's intentions were too, but didn't want Zach taking the fall for him. Ever the nice person. Maybe Alex deserved to have someone take the fall for him once in awhile.

"Yea, some guys." Zach replied, completely calm and indifferent. There were surprised looks and gasps all around them. A couple of cheerleaders even grabbed their phones and started typing. Zach was one of the most popular guys in school, so having him 'interested in guys' would be quite the news. Alex looked sad next to him, probably already blaming the whole thing on himself.

Winston looked shocked and disappointed, obviously not going as he predicted. Alex shook his head disapprovingly at Winston and the other boy looked down immediately to avoid Alex's sharp gaze. What truly scared Zach was the fact that Winston knew enough about Zach to know that he wasn't into guys, or maybe he just thought he wasn't out yet; either way, a lot more information than he should have.

Luck was finally on Zach and Alex's side however, as a guy named Nate finally failed Zach's dare to lick Diego's shoes. Diego yelled victoriously, thanking Zach for the genius dare. Nate didn't seem too bothered by it, probably just exhausted and wanting to go to sleep already. Immediately after, Zach and Alex gave an affirmative nod to each other before leaving the game, as well as a few others.

The walk to their tent was silent, in fact, even as they arrived to their tent and lay in their sleeping bags, they still hadn't said anything to each other. The silence was soothing, yet anxiety-inducing at the same time. It was only about 10 minutes in to them trying to fall asleep, when Alex finally found the courage to break the silence.

"I'm really sorry... I think we should stop pretending for Winston." Alex said softly, sounding very sad.

"You have nothing to be sorry about, it was my idea. And I should have listened to you when you said we should leave. I'm sorry." Zach said, with a surprisingly clear head to spite all the alcohol. Nothing that serious happened, or so Zach told himself. He felt cold then, and he realized he really wanted to be close to Alex again. Normally he'd ignore this kind of feeling, but thanks to all the alcohol, the words had left his mouth no sooner than they entered his head. "Can I hug you? I mean - you know, in case Winston comes by or something." Zach said, mentally punching himself for how stupid that sounded.

"How drunk are you?" Alex said with a chuckle, but obliging nonetheless as he wiggled closer to Zach, his back pressing Zach's chest. Zach used his left arm to wrap around Alex's bag comfortably, already feeling so much better.

"Not drunk enough..." Zach said, taking in everything that happened that day.

 **The third time** , was the next day. Everyone was off on some sort of scavenger hunt the chaperones had arranged, but Zach couldn't really care any less about it. He found a nice boat on the shore of the lake and sad down, peacefully drinking his vodka from his flask. He thought about yesterday, and how he'd managed to make everything so much worse between Alex and him. But Zach always did that, he always ended up making things even worse whenever he'd try to help. All the happiness he'd ever felt had come back to make him unhappy. It was his very love and passion for sports that got him to where he is after all. Broken and useless and trying to drink his sorrows away. His thoughts were interrupted by a familiar yet distant voice.

"I think those float better on water than rocks." Zach smiled, immediately recognizing the voice and turning to his right to find Alex standing on top of a hill.

"Wanna find out?" Zach found himself offering. He probably shouldn't have. With everything that's happened between them the previous day, there was way too much awkwardness and tension between them; something Zach can't properly fix when he's still drunk. But then again he's always drunk nowadays.

"Yeah." Alex agreed, climbing down the hill with impressive speed. When he finally got on the boat, he eyed Zach seriously. "Pretty sure Winston was somewhere behind me." He said, sounding more than a little distressed. Zach took a deep breath. _Him again._ His hatred for Winston was at an all time high after he practically forced him to fake come out in front of everyone. Zach was one step away from finding him and drowning him in the lake. Alex was the only thing anchoring him away from doing something like that.

"Well if he wants to follow us now, he'll have to do quite a bit of swimming." Zach said with a grin as he got out the boat briefly to push it into the water. When he got back in, he grabbed the two oars and started rowing the boat.

"This is nice." said Alex after Zach had rowed them a few meters in. He had a shy smile on his face, yet, he didn't exactly look happy.

"You don't look okay. Did something happen?" Zach asked uneasily. Alex raised his eyebrows in surprise, before looking away coyly. "Friends who can tell each other anything?" Zach reminded the other boy, though it sounded more like a question.

"I just - I'm tired of thinking someone likes me just to get my heart broken." Alex confessed, his eyes pleading for Zach to notice something, looking rather troubled to share this with Zach.

"This is about Winston, right?" Zach asked obliviously. He knew Winston was obviously a part of it, but he couldn't help but think that there was something more to Alex's words. Alex looks down.

"Jessica, Winston,..." Alex was about to say another name before he looked away. Zach's heart sank. Somehow he knew, the other boy meant him as well. "I-I just feel like maybe I'm just not meant to be happy, or like..." Alex trailed off, desperately looking anywhere but at Zach.

"Listen man, happiness, it just makes us unhappy." Zach said. He thought of Hannah and how she said the only way not to feel sad is not to feel anything at all. Maybe she had the right idea.

"I thought for a minute maybe I had found something kinda close but... I was just wrong." Alex said, still avoiding his eyes. Zach didn't know who he meant now, trying not to think about how he hoped that he was the one who made Alex 'kinda happy', and not Winston.

"Shit." He said absentmindedly, before taking another sip from his flask. "it's just like, we chase shit that we think is gonna make us happy, but it doesn't. It just ends sad. Every fucking time. Every fucking time!" He said with a light and sarcastic chuckle before taking yet another sip from his flask. He thought of Hannah as he said it, of Chloe, and of... Alex. The other boy would be so much happier if he just stopped chasing after him. Zach was a mess, he was trouble. He wondered if this is what Hannah felt like, trying desperately to be okay with not being happy.

"That's why you gotta be okay with not being happy, That's what sets you free. That's what makes us free. The fact that you can just, like, let go of everything and just say 'Fuck it' you know? Just fuck it all." Zach said, realizing how drunk he must sound as every word left his lips. "Fuck it all!" He repeated a little louder, this time. Alex just nodded, finally a smile forming on his lips.

"Fuck it all." Alex said, taking Zach's flask and holding it up in a silent 'cheers' before taking a sip.

"Whoa." Zach said, chuckling.

"Fuck it all!" Alex said once again, this time standing up on the boat with the flask high in the air. Alex smiled, letting out an appreciative 'oh' at the courage the other boy had before standing up himself and taking back the flask.

"Fuck it all!" Zach said, suddenly very conscious about how close their faces were. So he turned around, as they kept repeating the words like a mantra. It felt good, like they were finally letting go of the shit they can control, even more so than that night at the rooftop.

"Fuck it all!" He heald Alex yell out one last time before he felt the boat shake, followed by a consecutive splash in the water. Zach giggled at first as he fell down on the boat from the violent rocking, in his drunken state completely overlooking how loud the splash was and the fact that Alex had TBI. But just as he was about to take another sip off of his flask, he realized what had actually happened and the fact that Alex had still not resurfaced. A surge of panic overtook him as he looked at the wavy waters of the lake. He jumped into the water immediately, ignoring his damaged leg as he dived down to see Alex sinking deeper and deeper, completely unresponsive. _Shit!_

Zach caught up to him and wrapped one of his arms around him securely. However, as soon as he did that, Alex started panicking and fidgeting in the water, waving his hands and legs everywhere in shock. But Zach was stronger and used every ounce of strength he could muster to get them above water straight away. He gasped as his head popped out of the surface. He was relieved when he heard the other boy gasping for air and coughing out water as well. _He's safe._

Zach didn't take them back onto the boat however, instead exhausting himself completely by carrying the both of them to the shore. He groaned as he lay Alex as gently as he could on the grounds, his muscles sore and aching and begging him to let go of the other boy, before he plumped down on the ground hard himself, next to Alex.

"Holy shit, Alex you almost died." Zach said grunting and groaning as he took deep breaths. He started giggling, trying to dilute the stress and anxiety of the situation. But when he noticed Alex was barely breathing, he felt guilt wash over him like the waves of that stupid lake. "Alex, you with me man?" He asked worriedly, But Alex was looking over the hill where he was when he'd found Zach earlier "Talk to me, come on. What the fuck is going on man?" Zach said, mostly referring to how unresponsive he was underwater until he just... wasn't, but also worried about how close he looked to crying.

"Winston - looking at us... Shit's so fucked up - I can't do this anymore." Alex said, in between pants and sobs. Zach looked at the other boy with pity. He's responsible for this. He had just wanted to help him get rid of Winston but all he did was just double down on the grief he was going through from Winston. Speaking of who, Zach wasn't sure whether or not Alex meant he was looking at them right now or if he was just generalizing, but he didn't wanna look around to find out. So he took Alex's hand in his, dirtied by the rocks and sand of the beach. It was just a precaution in case Alex meant Winston was looking at them, at least, that's what he told himself. Alex met his eyes then, an all too familiar longing look in his eyes. His hair was wet and slick, practically glued to his forehead, his blue eyes highlighted by his moist face and the redness of his cheeks. He looked beautiful, Zach realized.

"I saw Bryce down there...I-I can't believe I killed someone..." He confessed, looking at Zach as if his life depended on him. But Zach found himself not knowing what to say.

"We both did. You wouldn't have been able to if I wasn't so vindictive and stupid." Zach said, cussing at himself internally.

"No - You didn't - I just pushed him off the docks... Just like that..." Alex said, sobbing.

"Why did you do it? You never did tell me." Zach asked, his voice void of any judgement, just compassion and empathy. But Alex looked away from him shortly, his lips twitching.

"He said he'd ruin your life." Alex confessed, meeting his eyes again, tears rolling down his cheeks. Zach's heart stopped. He was even responsible for the worst decision Alex had ever made. It was all his fault.

"He had already done that." Zach said, not being able to overlook the irony. Alex had a sad and understanding expression on his face. Zach knew that he of all people understood what it was like to feel broken. The longing had still been visible in his ocean blue eyes, but then, Alex let out a disappointed sigh and just settled on resting his head on Zach's chest, sobbing quietly. Zach relaxed into the embrace, immediately feeling a strange warm and fuzzy feeling take over his entire body. But he didn't think about it.

 **The fourth time** , they had finally returned to the campsite after everything that happened at the lake.

Their clothes were soaking wet and Zach was exhausted. Every muscle in his body ached, especially the leg that Bryce had damaged beyond repair. They even found themselves limping more than usual on their way back, holding on to each other for support. They let out a breath of relief when they finally entered their tent.

"Take your clothes off." Zach said nonchalantly, not thinking about how those words sounded in his tired state. But Alex seemed to understand anyway, and he took off his flannel and grey jumper, all be it with a blush on his cheeks. Zach took off his own black jumper and dropping it on the floor. He turned around, moving for his gym bag where he had spare clothes, but was met with a shirtless Alex. He swallowed, finding himself looking at Alex's chest more than he should.

They'd been shirtless around each other countless times, and Zach had never looked at him this way before, nor had he even so much as thought about Alex's body this way. So why? Why did he suddenly want nothing more than to place his hands on it, explore the delicate skin and muscles beneath his touch, feel the warmth of his body heat? His body turned then, and he looked up to see Alex looking back at him and his own shirtless form. They just stared at each other for, what felt like, the longest couple of seconds ever.

Alex was right, everything is fucked. What is happening between them? When did the dynamic of their relationship change so drastically? At what point did Alex start thinking about kissing Zach? At what point did Zach start thinking about exploring the other boy's body beneath his fingertips?

He swallowed again, looking away awkwardly and feeling the other boy do the same. Zach brushed off his thoughts, blaming it on the alcohol, before looking around the floor for his gym bag.

"Zach! Winston's coming this way!" Alex said with a groan, looking through the entrance of his tent out of the corner of his eye. Zach let out an exasperated breath.

"Oh for fuck's sake already! I am not in the mood to deal with him right now." Zach said, feeling Alex flinch at his tone. He came off angrier than he intended to. He gave him an apologetic look, not wanting Alex to be on the receiving end of his pent-up aggression.

"So,uh, what do we do?" The brunet asked, looking lost. _What can they do?_ Winston already knew they were 'together', so nothing they could do would prevent him from just walking in and doing whatever he's coming over to do. Alex was still in pain, in fact he was currently at his lowest, and Zach is really afraid he's going to do something he regrets. They had to get out of it somehow, yet there was no easy way. Unless...

Zach gulped. They already made out with their shirts on, what difference will making out with their shirts off make? Except hopefully give Winston the wrong impression. It was a completely stupid idea, nothing would stop Winston, especially being jealous as he was, to stop them and talk to them anyway. Yet... Zach wanted to do it. Neither were looking through the opening of the tent, so as not to arouse suspicion for whatever they were about to do, but they didn't have a lot of time left.

"Come here." He said before he could stop himself. Alex looked at him, vulnerability painted all over his expression and demeanor as he pushed himself a little closer to Zach. With an urgency and passion that surprised even himself, Zach grabbed a hold of Alex and pushed himself down to lay fully on his back, taking the other boy down with him as their lips collided in a kiss.

It was affectionate and passionate just like all their previous kisses, but there was also something different about it. An urgency that both boys recognized all too well, yet, never with another guy. They forgot all about WInston's apparent impending arrival as all they could focus on was each other. Zach could have sworn he heard footsteps outside at one point, but couldn't bother to check.

Their hands were all over each other as they started rolling around over in the tent. Their tongues played with each other, starting to wrestle for dominance, which Zach was willing to give to Alex and let him control the pace. Alex groaned at the sudden liberty and that's when Zach felt all the blood rushing to his crotch, to a tightness in his pants which were still wet from the lake.

"Stop!" He yelled out, pulling away from Alex. He got up on his knees and looked at his pants to see his erection trying to break free through the fabric. Embarrassment swept through him, his face turning red as he turned to look at Alex. The other boy was frozen, his jaw dropped as he looked at Zach's pants. He met his eyes then, trying to get words to come out of his mouth.

"I-It's probably because of the... physical... contact... and all that." Alex said, making a ridiculous gesture with his hands. Zach got a sense of déjà vu, recalling when Alex got hard in the locker room, remembering saying the exact same words to Alex when he saw it. Alex didn't seem to have done it on purpose however, as he winced soon after. "L-Look it's normal reaction, I mean, w-we were practically-"

"Yeah." Zach agreed dumbly, not even letting Alex finish his thought. The brunet nodded awkwardly, before his eyes widened in realization as he looked through the opening of their tent. He got out of the tent, taking a look round before coming back inside.

"Winston's gone... At least we scared him off... If he was even coming in here in the first place." Alex said, still flustered. Zach's erection finally went down. He exhaled deeply, glancing to meet Alex's eyes for only a brief moment before looking away again, reaching for his gym bag. Zach unzipped his gym bag and pulled out some clothes, when a thought occurred to him. He pulled out a regular grey hoodie and sweatpants and a black shirt and threw them at Alex, who managed to catch them before turning to look at him in confusion.

"Clothes to change in." Zach simply said, looking away immediately. He didn't know if Alex had brought spare clothes himself, but hoped that he'd take them anyway. Zach had expected him to be more conservative with his affection, but after getting a boner while making out with your best friend, what was really left.

Interestingly enough, Alex had accepted the clothes and started to put them on. Zach gulped. immediately regretting his decision as he saw the oversized shirt fit Alex almost like a dress. He looked away, frustrated with the betrayed of his mind. He grabbed a black hoodie, a lame google shirt and grey sweatpants and put them on as swiftly as possible. For the first time, he was grateful his mother was a strict helicopter parent and silently thanking her for all the clothes. He somehow managed to dress himself before Alex did

"I need some air." Zach said, instantly storming out of the tent. Alex called out for him, but Zach had already left.

 **The fifth time** , was an hour later. Zach had been sitting on the grass a little ways away from the campsite. The sun was starting to set, which meant he would have to come back soon and talk to Alex. He sighed, wondering how he went from feeling guilty about leading Alex on to feeling like he was actually into him. But, no, that couldn't be. He just didn't feel about any guys that way. They were just making out, they were shirtless, it's normal. But what wasn't normal is wanting to pick up where they left off.

"Penny for your thoughts? He heard a sarcastic voice say to his left. A voice vaguely familiar. He turned to find none other than Winston staring at him. Zach got to his feet immediately. "I went by your tents for a little chat but I guess you were a little... preoccupied." Zach's cheeks burned up. So he was coming to talk to them.

"You have some nerve talking to me after what you forced me to do yesterday." Zach said coldly, clenching his fist.

"I didn't force you to do anything. You had plenty of chances to withdraw, even before the game started. You were just too drunk to care until the storm hit you." Winston said smugly. Zach shook his head at his carefree attitude.

"What the fuck is your problem?" He spat, stepping a little closer.

"My problem is, you're kissing my boyfriend." Winston said, raising his tone.

"Oh, I'm sorry. Last I checked you were the one who dared us to make out." Winston looked unimpressed. "And he's not your boyfriend." Zach added for good measure.

"I've noticed." Winston replied bitterly. "What I don't know is why."

"Don't act like you don't know..." Zach scoffed, but Winston just shrugged.

"Please enlighten me." He challenged, looking at Zach with anticipation. Zach swallowed, choosing his words carefully. This was never going to end unless Zach gave him a half-truth.

"How about the fact that you were Monty's boyfriend." Zach smirked when he saw WInston's face drop. "And how you think Monty was framed and how you're using Alex because you think one of us killed Bryce."

"I don't know what Clay and Ani have told you, but I would never do that to Alex. And I don't think one of you did it, I know it. And I bet my money it was either Clay or Ani." Zach's face stayed neutral and inexpressive, almost finding it funny how wrong he was, but distracted by Winston saying he would never manipulate Alex. "I love him." Winston added firmly, trying to reassure Zach. The jock felt that same tight feeling in his chest from yesterday all over again.

"Yeah, well, I love him too." Zach said quickly, freaking out on the inside at how honest those words felt coming out of his lips. Winston nodded, his gaze finally softening.

"I know... I see the way you look at him. I saw it ever since me and Alex first started hanging out." Winston said, his tone suddenly a lot nicer. Zach's breath stopped. What did he mean the way he looked at him? How was Zach looking at him and how long had he been doing it?

"You looked so jealous too..." Winston added with a grin. _Jealous_. That's why he got that tightness in his chest whenever he saw or heard about Alex and Winston. But why? Why was he jealous all of a sudden? Zach had so many questions.

"If you truly loved him, you'd want him to be happy." Zach said, changing the topic.

"I do. And you're right, he's happiest when he's with you. He looks at you with such admiration. All you would have to do is use some of your charm and he'd follow you to hell itself. He knew I wasn't at the game yesterday to make any friends, and he begged you to leave, but you didn't listen, so he stayed anyway." Winston said and Zach looked down with shame at the memory. "Your drinking is a problem. Earlier today you almost didn't even realize he'd gone underwater." Zach looked at him, taken aback. Winston had seen that too. "Next time, you might not be sober enough to save him at all." Winston said, and Zach's heart almost stopped at the thought of it.

"There won't be a next time." Zach said firmly, dedication in his eyes.

"I sure hope so." Winston said with a half-smile, before turning around and starting to walk away.

"What did you love about him exactly?" Zach asked, his voice ringing with suspicion, but also curiosity. Winston turned his head to look at him.

"He's the nicest person I've ever met, really smart, talented, considerate. And so strong, even after everything he's gone through, pushing through without any bad habits or self-pity. Basically my anti-thesis, but he never judged me. He was way more than I deserved, yet he liked me anyway. Sound familiar?" Winston explained warmly, recalling everything about Alex before leaving Zach to his thoughts.

When he returned to the campsite 15 minutes later, Alex hugged him, expressing how worried he was. They didn't talk much after that. Zach had sneaked so many glances at Alex that evening, as they all sat around the campsite, telling each other stories before they would have to go home first thing in the morning. The more Zach looked at him, the more obvious everything became. He loved Alex. He loved everything about him. His soft, beautiful hair, gorgeous, piercing blue eyes, soft and delicate face features, tight and fairly muscular body, his smile, his lips, _god his lips_ , his caring and compassionate nature, his strength... There was too much to name.

Alex had met his eyes as well, starting a weird staring contest between them. But they didn't talk about it. They didn't talk about it when Zach laced their fingers. They didn't talk about it when Zach gave him a random peck on the lips as they were all dismissed to their tents by the chaperones. They didn't talk about it when Zach noticed Alex was still wearing Zach's clothes, even to sleep. And they didn't talk about it when they Zach cuddled Alex from behind as they drifted off to sleep.

 **And the sixth time** , was the next day. Zach had woken up before Alex to the sound of Mrs Jensen yelling at everyone to start packing up their tents and get ready to leave. He smiled as he saw the gentle rise and fall of the smaller boy's chest, his eyes closed and peaceful, deep in sleep. He brushed some hair out of his forehead and placed a gentle kiss on it before getting up.

It didn't take too long for him to pack everything, as he hadn't brought much. Everything was neatly put away except for the tent, Alex's sleeping bag and his flask. He stared at the flask for a good five minutes right outside the tent. He thought of how it first bewitched him with it's illusion of relief and how it proceeded to try and ruin anything stable he had left after his entire future was taken away from him. He looked at Justin in the distance, talking to Clay, and remembered everything he'd accomplished. If he could do it, so could he. Zach smiled, taking the lid off and pouring the remainder of the vodka out onto the grass.

"What are you doing?" Alex chuckled sleepily next to him. It took Zach by surprise, he hadn't even heard him come out.

"Letting go of the shit I can't control." Zach said, turning to look at him with a warm smile. "Alex I am so sorry for how I've been these past few months and what I've put you through." He said, but Alex looked dumbfounded.

"You don't have anything to apologize for, Zach." He said, looking at Zach weirdly and then glancing at the flask, a realization seemingly coming to him. "If you mean the alcohol, I should really be the one apologizing. I endorsed you going completely off the rails."

"No you didn't. Pretty sure you were one of the few people constantly telling me to stop and asking me if I was okay." Zach said, smiling as he remembered Alex trying to take Zach's flask away from him but Zach holding it higher than Alex could reach.

Very soon the buses arrived, by which time they had absolutely everything packed and loaded. As Zach and Alex took their seats, Zach looked at Alex again, wondering how to even breach the next topic. Alex met his eyes, shaking his head as to ask him 'what's wrong?'

"Happiness does make you unhappy, but, you know, sometimes it's just worth it in the long haul." Zach blurted out nervously. The expression on Alex's face was priceless. He furrowed his eyebrows but his lips were curled in a smile, looking at Zach as if he was a lunatic. He wouldn't be wrong. Zach decided to swallow his words until he actually knew what to say. During the trip back, Alex had fallen asleep on Zach's shoulder, commenting how he hadn't slept enough just before he dozed off. Zach turned his head to rest on top of Alex's. How was he supposed to tell him that he didn't want to pretend anymore? That they didn't need to. How would he react?

He woke Alex up gently when they finally arrived, already formulating his words as they slowly started getting out of the bus.

"Ugh, I can't believe we have to go back to school tomorrow, the least they could have done is combine it with our weekend." Alex groaned out, carrying his bag away from the crowded area around the buses.

"It's Friday tomorrow so you'll get your weekend soon enough, Who knows, maybe you'll finally beat me in Mario Kart." Zach teased, nudging him playfully.Their conversations were going smoothly so far, but there was still so much tension between them, especially after what happened in the tent. Neither acknowledged it, though they could it feel by the way their dynamic had changed. Zach halted suddenly, and it took a few more steps for Alex to notice Zach wasn't following so he stopped as well, looking at him.

"Zach?" He asked, stepping a little closer. But Zach didn't say anything, just kept looking at his eyes, waiting for the words he'd so meticulously planned out to come out. They didn't, instead, Zach leaned in and pressed a chaste kiss to the smaller boy's lips, not unlike the first one they shared. Alex looked at him in shock, not expecting the kiss. Then his face dropped.

"Look, Zach. I've been meaning to tell you. You don't have to pretend for Winston anymore-"

"It's not about Winston." Zach interrupted, saying it way too quickly.

"What?" Alex said, his face scrunched up. But Zach looked down, finding himself speechless. All that planning on what to say gone into the wind with just one look from the other boy.

"Look... I was wondering... You know, if maybe you'd be willing to give this - us, a shot." Zach said nervously, fidgeting with his fingers.

"What?" The other boy repeated, making Zach laugh nervously.

"What I'm saying is... It's been really confusing, but I like you dumbass." He confessed, holding both of Alex's hands with his own.

"B-But you said-"

"I know what I said. It's just that, pretending to be your boyfriend - even if it was just, ugh, kissing and stuff, well, it really made me realize how much I... actually wanted to be your boyfriend." Zach explained with a nervous smile. Alex was speechless, his eyes looking almost watery. "I mean, only if you feel the same wa-" His words were muted by Alex pulling him by his arm with a surprising amount of strength and pressing their lips together. They smiled in the kiss, gentler than some of the other ones they had had in the past, but with a lot more meaning. As they pulled away slowly, they looked at each other and started giggling in this belief.

"God, I-... What will everyone say?" Alex said, a bewildered and embarrassed smile on his face.

"Who cares. Fuck 'em all." Zach said with a shrug, referring back to their boat ride on the lake.

"Fuck 'em all." Alex repeated.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading!  
> Any feedback would be greatly appreciated :)  
> Also I'm curious, which time was your favorite?


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